Published Feb. 25, 2005
Adult survivors of child sexual abuse need not suffer alone
In every gathering of adults — a family, a work environment, a church community — there are likely present those who were sexually abused as children. Each person deals with his or her painful experiences in a unique way. It can be helpful, however, to consider a few facts about these situations.
There are strong reasons why children do not reveal abuse at the time of the incident. They include the following:
• The child suffers from unconscious feelings of shame, disbelief and denial. It is common to delay disclosure for years, often into adulthood. Whenever a person decides to deal with past abuse is the right time for that individual. This is a personal decision.
• Predators often threaten or bribe children to keep abuse a secret. Perpetrators tell their victims that they brought the abuse on themselves. Of course, this is never the case. Predators, however, are skilled manipulators. They know how to use fear and intimidation to keep their evil secrets.
• Young victims might not fully understand what has happened to them. It is only years later that they realize how seriously the abuse is affecting them.
An adult who has suffered abuse does not need to continue to suffer alone. Here are some sources of help:
• Loving and supportive people. Once the abuse stops, the worst is over. Those who love the victim are usually willing to help in the process of healing.
• Improved information. An Internet search can provide useful information about how to get help. Internet information must be evaluated selectively. However, it has the advantage of anonymity and confidentiality.
• Professional help. Counselors and support groups are sources of help for many victims.
• There are organizations with the specific goal of helping victims. In Alaska, these include (STAR) Standing Together Against Rape (800-478-8999), Aid Abuse and Rape Emergencies (586-6623), Alaska Network on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault (586-3650) and Advocates for Victims of Violence (835-2980).
Hope is a powerful virtue. It is a gift to the human spirit. Hope can triumph over abuse. We pray that those among us who have been victimized can experience the hope to enable them to begin healing. Their courage in doing so is a source of inspiration to others who have been victimized, and to the entire Christian community.