Published March 25, 2005
Let the odds against abuse be in your favor
The Safe Environment Committee in the archdiocese works to read and evaluate published information on sexual abuse. There is a pamphlet written by a group called From Darkness to Light, 247 Meeting St., Charleston, SC 29401. The Internet address of the group is www.darkness2light.org.
Their advice is sensible and easy to follow. Among their recommendations is that adults interested in protecting children systematically work to minimize opportunities for abuse.
It should not come as a surprise that more than 80 percent of sexual abuse cases happen in one-adult/one-child situations. Perpetrators are not about to risk discovery. Secrecy is of the utmost importance to them.
Abusers often become friendly with potential victims and with their whole families, enjoying family activities and earning family trust. Then they move on to isolate one child or youth in order to victimize him or her.
For this reason, it is important to look for group situations rather than placing one child alone with one adult. Children and teens are generally always safer in a group.
Parents can lobby effectively for policies that limit one-adult/one-child situations in all youth-related activities such as sports teams, church events and school clubs.
It is also important to make sure that parents can drop in unannounced at any time to observe or help with activities. Parents need to make sure that background checks have been done on all people working directly with children.
A comfortable, inclusive atmosphere should be the hallmark of a good youth program. Children can be taught to understand that working to achieve their safety is part of a parent’s job.
It is important to monitor Internet use. Pedophiles are gaining access to children through Internet activities. This is a common practice, not a rare exception.
Potential abusers chat patiently with children, gain their trust, and lure them into face-to-face meetings. Parents need to pay close attention to how much time children and teens are spending online and what they are doing during these periods.
Children often think they are safe in disclosing personal information to contacts they have made online. Anonymity does not guarantee safety. On the contrary, the possibility of secrecy always appeals to those bent on harming children.
Parents can set a good example by personally avoiding one-adult/one-child situations with children who are not their own. Group activities help minimize potentially dangerous situations. Work to keep the odds favoring child safety on your side.